Why We Mock Them

I recently found this piece of shit (at a place different from the link provided, on a blog belonging to one of the ugliest, stupidest men on the fucking planet). This is some monkey-brained garbage by one Charles Adler that's burning up the right-wing stupid-o-sphere. It's his gleeful burying of the proposed coalition between Jack Layton's NDP and Stephane Dion's Liberals. This is what happens when one of these pompous asses tries really hard to be eloquent and intelligent; they poop their pants! Observe.

Dear Jack,

We've been friends for a long time and friends really ought to tell friends the truth. So since nobody else has told you, I think it's time for me to step up and get it done.

Jack, when you and Gilles Duceppe were first putting this coup together, you felt you had a strong hand because the Liberals had such a weak one. After the fall election, Harper had 46 percent of the seats in the Commons. He was within a whisker of a majority, and Stephane Dion, a marshmallow at the best of times, had just been roasted by voters. His part ended up with only 25 percent of the seats. Between Duceppe’s separatists in the sticks of Quebec, and your crew Jack, you had more seats than Dion. Power abhors a vacuum. Everyone knows the game. You approached Dion with a plan to get him one last kick at the can. He was never going anywhere on his own but if you and Duceppe got together with him, between the three of you, you'd have something you could call a coalition. Never mind that nobody voted for that.

First of all, "Charlie," standard parliamentary practice isn't a coup. You ought not to be setting yourself up for a thorough thrashing like this. And pull your head out of your ass. Gilles Duceppe was not going to be a member of the coalition. He was going to support it in return for some consideration for Quebec in the coalition's budget.

You could always finesse that with the willingness of many members of the media whose hatred for Harper would blind them of three obvious facts:

1) Nobody in the country thought Stephane Dion should be prime minister.

2) Nobody in the country thought we could have a stable central government which owed its allegiance to the bastard child of the Parti Quebecois - which owes its allegiance to people who want to blow a hole right through the heart of Canada. And;

3) Since no political party ran on the idea of a coalition, and nobody voted for a coalition, nobody thought it was a good idea to have a government based on something nobody voted for or wanted, even though your media friends at the CBC did think this whole thing was a lot of fun. Mr. Mansbridge said the other day during one of his At Issue Panel Discussions, that he and others in the media were really missing all the fun they were having before Christmas when you, Gilles and Stephane were talking about seducing the Governor General into the idea of going along with your scam, what I called the Three Stooges of Coupscam.

Well, here dipshit, you've outsmarted yourself. Obviously 28% of Canadians wanted Dion to be prime minister because they voted for the Liberal Party of which he was the leader. Your hysterics about the Bloq Quebecois reveal either a stupendous ignorance or a disgusting hypocrisy, because as you ought to know, your precious Stephen Harper was prepared to launch a "coup" against the "elected government of Canada" with the assistance of that self-same Bloc. Note, harpo was proposing a coalition even though nobody had voted for one.

On Friday, Mr. Harper went before television cameras to slam a potential Dion-led government as illegitimate because he lost the Oct. 14 election.
But the Liberals and NDP said those arguments were undercut by Mr. Harper's 2004 letter to then-governor-general Adrienne Clarkson, which requested that she turn to him if Paul Martin's newly elected government were defeated in the Commons.
"We respectfully point out that the opposition parties, who together constitute a majority in the House, have been in close consultation. We believe that, should a request for dissolution arise this should give you cause, as constitutional practice has determined, to consult the opposition leaders and consider all of your options before exercising your constitutional authority," the 2004 letter stated.

Either way, Charlie, you're a stupid fuck. The fact that right-wing cretins read this nonsensical drivel without getting embarrassed right there is testimony to your political movement's total intellectual bankruptcy. And finally, regarding that last little bit, I took notice of your whining about media hatred of Harper. You fucking right-wing cry-babies should really get a grip. Every lazy-assed one of you. Harper's gotten kid-glove treatment from the media. The occasional bit of critical reporting sends you all bawling to your mommies like idiots. Grow the fuck up.

Now Jack, outside of these three facts that made it impossible to get your coaltion contraption to take flight, there were some other things said during the bad sales job which you keep on wanting to say, and it's time I think to put a final cork in the bottle. You keep talking about how the Harper Tories only got 38 percent of the popular vote. And so therefore, 62 percent voted for change. Wrong Jack. Those 62 percent didn't vote for change. They voted for Liberals and Greens and Separatists and your team. Nobody voted for a coalition. I'm starting to think that the 38 percent the Conservatives got isn't what's getting under your skin, Jack. It's the 18 percent of the vote that you got. Sorry to break it to you, but no matter how often you say you are applying for the job of the prime minister, fewer than one in five voters actually take you seriously.

Charlie, Charlie, Charlie! Regardless of how you want to spin it, 62% of the electorate voted for someone other than your idiotic hero. Let's just get that out of the way. harpo got a minority, do you understand this? Do you understand what that means in a parliamentary system? I suspect you don't. harpo certainly didn't. In a minority government, the PM has to reach out to at least one other party, or to at least enough opposition MPs to give him the confidence of a majority of the House. He does not get to say: "I have the single-biggest bloc of seats in the House of Commons, therefore everyone else can go fuck themselves." Do you understand this Charlie? Again, I imagine not. Because you're a pig-headed idiot.

62% of the electorate has the brains to realize that voting for your party is voting for dog-shit. It's voting for blatant criminality. It's voting for massive incompetence. You can sit in your cushy job (provided by capitalist idiots) and bitch and whine about how the media hates you, but really Charlie, it's just the fact that the majority of this country isn't as stupid as you and your ilk are.

I am starting to think that what also bothers you is how efficient the Tories are compared to your crew. They got 38 percent of the vote, but 46 percent of the seats. And while you got 18 percent of the vote, you only got 12 percent of the seats. It must bug you Jack, that the Tories are competitive virtually everywhere in the country except in two cities, while you are really competitive only in the poverty pockets. I can see it with my own eyes Jack. I travel through one of those pockets every day. Your representative there is hardly ever there. And he doesn't need to be. A monkey could win that riding representing the NDP. It's dirt poor and safe. If this country was poor as you pretend it is, your vote would be far more efficient. But it's primarily a middle class country and that's why your party is just a rump, a protest movement.

Hey Charlie, it won't be a primarily middle class country for much longer under the corporate tag-team of the Liberals and the Conservatives. But you do have a solid lock on the STUPIDEST THIRTY PERCENT of the electorate. Keep crowing about that Charlie. There's your fucking radio audience. There's your dupes, there's your meal ticket. But I can't get too mad at you Charlie. You're obviously one of them. They're your people, ... if the quality of this screed of yours is any indication of your general mental ability. Oh, and your gratuitous remarks about this unidentified NDP MP? Shove 'em up your fat ass. As if the CPC doesn't have idiot time-servers.

You talk about Canada adopting a different system of government like those mature democracies. Now the most mature Democracy in Europe is the United Kingdom. Guess where we got our system from, Jack. Remember it was the Queen’s representative in Canada - who in your fantasies - was going to go along with your crackerjack of a coalition. The Queen's representative. We have the same system as Europe's most mature democracy.

Yes Charlie. We got our system from the UK. Guess what dimwit? They have coalitions too from time-to-time. And, no --- they don't have to run as coalitions. They just don't. That's just the way it is you ignoramus.

Now I am going to submit to you Jack that the most important aspect of any demoracy is the maturity of its leaders. Maturity, meaning adult, meaning being able to handle the truth responsibly. I am going to ask you to be mature and please accept what I’m about to tell you like an adul

Okay, Charlie; let's hear it:

The biggest democracy in that Mature Continent called Europe is Germany.

Um, okay. Germany is the biggest democracy in Europe ...

Know why Germany has a democracy? Because Canadian soldiers gave their lives to liberate Germany from a man who was willing to turn them all into slaves. I'm always reminding you that good, decent Canadians in this country tell me that if it wasn't for what Canada and its allies did, Germany would have stayed a dictatorship for a thousand years or longer and who knows what kind of damage would have been done to its people and people all over the world. So Jack, I want you to take this like a man. Canada isn't just a wonderful democracy with no need for your scams and schemes and coalition dreams. Canada is actually one of the reasons why great big countries like Germany have a democracy.

Oh dear. Folks, I'm afraid we're going to have to call it a night. Mr. Adler's having one of his fits again. Babbling irrelevant nonsense. Oh my god! Somebody get him down from there!!!

Show a little pride Jack in what this country represents to other countries before you start down this road of how we should be like those others. Jack, you also talk so fondly of what the Americans have just done in putting Obama into power. Jack, if you look closely at what Obama stands for you'll find out he is way to the right of you. Whether its economics like free trade, social issues like gay marriage, foreign policy issues like the support of Israel - Obama is far closer to Stephen Harper than he is to you. And Jack, before you go too far down that road of envy, how much media do you think you’d get by being the leader of a third or fourth party in the U.S.?
Why don't you ask Ralph Nader or Bob Barr how much media attention they got in the final three months of their election campaign? Bob Who you ask? In the U.S. - you would be Jack Who.

Now he's not even talking about the coalition! He's just opening his bathrobe and clucking like a chicken. I'm sorry you had to see this ....

One final thing Jack, while you're thinking of hopefully abandoning this rhetoric about those mature democracies who are better than we are or the American democracy that is supposedly smarter than we are, change change change, please stop embarrassing yourself in trying to delegitamize the
Conservative victory by saying that 62 percent voted for change. Keep doing that and somebody is bound to look at how few points you put on the board in your own riding. Even though none of your opponents had anywhere near the kind of media attention that you have had, even though not one of them is a house hold name, their coalition vote - if you will – would beat you. You got 20 thousand votes in Toronto Danforth. But the coalition vote total of your opponents came out to 25 thousand. Twenty-five thousand for them. Twenty thousand for you. Did the people of your riding vote for getting rid of you, Jack? Were they voting for change? Hey, I could run the numbers up the flag pole in your lovely wife's riding. But I don't want to make this too personal, nor too cruel. I think you get the point Jack.

Oh wait, ... he's climbing down off the table. I think he's trying to return to the subject. Yes, you're right Mr. Adler, we have a first-past-the- post electoral system. And if Jack Layton had less votes than the combined votes of his opponents. If he had to stand in a Parliament representing only Toronto Danforth, he'd have to appease one or two of his rivals or they'd combine their votes and supplant him. But that doesn't happen in our system you moron, so it's entirely irrelevant. And for the record: Jack Layton's done more to respect the differences among his constituents than harpo's done for the vast majority of Canadians smart enough not to vote for the lying sack of shit. That's why harpo only wins minority governments. Most Canadians are smart enough not to trust him.

The moral of this story Jack is simple.

JESUS CHRIST!!!! I thought you said you were finishing!!! Dammit!! Sigh. Alright Charlie, ... continue ...

The system you are attacking

Um, Charlie. You're the one attacking our system of government. Not Jack. But do go on ...

...actually works really well for you and your wife and other members of your party which don't sell change at all, or hope for that matter. You sell hopelessness. You run the country down, by riding the backs of those who are down and out and ultimately only your core support comes from those who are down and out and feeling rather hopeless. Change isn't what they are voting for, Jack. Unfortunately, they are the ones who have given up on change and you are just moving in to take advantage, just like you moved into Stephane Dion's life once he was out of luck and hope and money. Yes, the system works well for you Jack and so does this country that affords a minority party like yours far more media attention and money than most marginals get in other parts of the world.

Why you graceless piece of shit. You disgusting excuse for a human being. You revolting lousy vermin. I'm not even going to condescend to debate with that. Fuck you.

Jack, by now I hope you understand

What? That Charles Adler is an old fool who doesn't understand how his own country's political system works? A jabbering moron jingoist who thinks a coalition government is spitting on World War II veterans? A loathsome hypocrite and elitist prick masquerading as a populist for all the mouth-breathing electoral cannon-fodder of the right-wing?

that the reason why the coalition scam didn't work is precisely because we are a mature democracy. And finally Jack, I want you to know that the reason things are the way they are for you - and you are on the outside looking in with your coalition idea - is because this is a mature democracy. Mature decisions have been made by people with more maturity than you currently possess. Canada is a Mature democracy and despite all the kicks it gets from you and your friends in low places, not all of them at the CBC, this is a great country where changes do happen for those who don't spend most of their lives running down the country they love and its institutions they respect, like their military, their mounties and their National Anthem. Call us crazy if you want to, Jack. We love our country just the way it is. And, if we don't have a system that makes it easy for you to have a seat at the cabinet table, well, we'll just have to suck it up and live with it. That's what mature people do in a democracy called Canada.

Now THAT is funny!! Mature? The party of Stockwell Day and Peter MacKay mature?? The party with the leader who launches frivolous lawsuits like the Cadman bribery tapes and then caves in before going to trial because it was all a stunt and a waste of taxpayers' money. harpo not showing up for the unveiling of his predecessor and colleague Joe Clark's official portrait is mature? harpo's manual for committee chairs to obstruct official business is mature? harpo's calling critics of Israel's wars of aggression and barbarism in Lebanon and Gaza "anti-Semites" is mature? The buffoonery at the hearings on the "in-out" campaign financing scandal is mature? --- joking about food poisoning deaths at a press conference is maturity? Violating your own fixed-election law to avoid facing the electorate during the 2009 recession is mature? Playing a game of political "chicken" two weeks into a new parliament to try to force another election is "mature"? One could go on and on. The fact of the matter is that there isn't a bigger group of immature, monkey-brained stupid crooks in all of Canada than the party of harpo.

Adler's braindead fans are all swooning. Congratulating him for "telling it like it is." The fact that he's telling it like it ain't has as little merit as the non-existence of bush II's weapons of mass destruction or the fraudulent nature of harpo's claims of tape-doctoring or the lies behind Flaherty's claims that he understands how the economy works.

These people are morons who fuck-up everything they do and say.

Somebody else already beat me to it. Dare to compare!!!